Journaling:

Today was probably one of the best days I've had in awhile . No mood swings, no tension, no nothing to face. Just a really nice day .

The boys and I went to my sister's house for the day. We had lots of fun! We had a barbecue, went swimming, the kids ran around with their cousins, and the baby got lots of attention from everyone there which meant Mommy's arms and hip were free all day ! I live for such days !

H called last night around 10:30pm or so. He was driving while (bf) was sleeping. H did most of the chatting with me listening. He basically just wanted to say "hi" and said he would either call me later last night or wait until today. Before we said "bye", H said "ILY". I told him the same.

He didn't call back last night -- I wasn't expecting him to anyway. He did call about an hour and a half ago though. It's been a long day for him. H, (bf), and another guy have been going door to door all day and haven't done too well (duh! It's a holiday weekend ! That's why no one's home.). H had sold 2 and (bf) sold 1. He's feeling discouraged, but he wants to sell at least 3 more deals. H said he's waiving the activation fee of $50 to get people to sign up, therefore he's only making $100 per deal. AND these people have to get approved and installed before he can get paid for them. I hope it all works out for H otherwise he'll be REALLY p*ssed about having gone all that way for nothing .

H said he was feeling like he was "out of it". Like he couldn't function. I asked if he had eaten anything (many times he'll go all day without eating especially when he's working). He said yes. He and (bf) ate some chinese food for lunch, and H immediately threw in, "I kept it all in, too, in case you're wondering. I told you I'm not doing that anymore." I said, "Ok...I wasn't thinking about that, but I'm glad anyway. That's good." Then H said, ".....I don't know.....Maybe I AM depressed." I asked, "About?" H said, "About everything. I want to make at least $500 out here before I leave....Maybe I'll just come home tonight. I don't know." I said, "Well, I'm sure not getting as many sales as you'd like is playing a part in it." H said, "Yeah, definitely......Well, it's still early, so I'm heading back out. I'll call you later. Tell the boys hi for me and tell them I love them." I said I would then we said goodbye.

So...tomorrow should be another great day filled with lots of FUN ! We're going to the annual festival. The kids love playing games and going on the rides ! Mmmmm....I can already smell all the yummy food ! Too bad H will be missing out.

Thanks for listening. Enjoy the holiday !

JV

Valerie

"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown

"Piecing is not for the faint of heart." ~ sage