JV
i think the same as Ellie... maybe alcohol and all the back memories around you do a lot...!!
Reading your gentle intimate description and that conversation you and h had, i can remember hatefull and hurting words my h had said me in back crisis since 3 years in a row... and now, when we talked about that, he always said this wors were said only bc the moment... I dont know and still doesnt beleive him... but i also know sitch can changes and men use to live by moments, scenary, changng from one to the other so easy and quickly... Last sunday, when h and me were intimate finally afer almost 5 months, although i had thpught abput this moment so scared bc me not functioning well or him, was so great... and he feel it bc the message hi sent me... he doesnt use at all to send me cell messag, so... yes, i made him feel great...!... and i will remember this for the future... when that terrible and hurting words can arouse from him... bla bla bla... i am atractive and i can makes you feel so high in intimate R... I think his change modd after that intimate moment was him thinking again... so... i said i dont feel happy... i had said her i dont desire her... but i not only desore her yesterday but also enjoy it too much... what a hell is going on inside of me..!! .. So relax... take a breath... dont think too much on that past words as the true... and continue going on....
Andrea