2005 Goals:

To not NEED another person to fill a void, to fill that void with my life and happiness so that if there ever is another person they don't become the center of my life. I think this is the big over all goal and the goals below are the steps to work towards accomplishing this state of mind and enjoyment of my life.


I think I am making progress on this main overall goal as I am filling my life with other activities. I still at times miss that close companionship I had with D but it isn't as often as it used to be.

I believe I have made more progress in this area, that miss of close companionship is still once in a while there but not as often now days.

Something I have also came to realize is I depended on D for every facet of my activities. It is good to have friends in different areas for different activities. I am working to try to cultivate friends with different interests or at least learn more of my dog friends interests so that our friendship laps into different areas.

Lately it has been all dog stuff, but the Nationals was a bit of a push to be ready for the show!

Continue to work on the black/white thinking and emotional reacting. Focus on Thinking first, then Act if necessary.

I haven't read much in the books I want to read yet but do feel I am making some progress in this area. Have had to deal with some not very nice e-mails from D and have worked really hard on my responses rather than do my old knee jerk reacting.

Haven't heard from D in quit some time and have had some emotional times when I just wanted to write him a scathing e-mail. Tell him I was going to take him back to court and how awful I though he was for all the lies and the affair. Each time I didn't do it. I still think I do lots of b/w emotional thinking but also feel I am getting better at realizing when I am doing it and working to stop it.


Continue monitoring the self talk and redirecting it when necessary

This seems to be going pretty well most of the time. Still have emotional spells where I know I'm not redirecting it as much as needed.

Still monitoring and still doing negative self talk. But working on it!


Spend more time with my friends

A friend went with me to one of the herding lessons. A new friendship that I am building went with me to a different herding lesson. Starting a puppy class this week and two of my friends that I haven't seen that much lately are also taking puppies to the class.

The puppy class fell through as one friends puppy was sick and the other one's got hurt. Still I am talking with both of them a bit more often now. Have mostly been spending time lately with Shara working on herding to be ready for the Sheltie Nationals!!!

Work on organization and fitness

This is an area that has totally made no progress and I think if anything is worse!

STILL no progress! Going to have to adjust some priorities!!!!

Work with Shara on herding

Shara has been doing great with the herding. We have had at least one lesson a month and some months two, as well as going to the friend's house and her just letting me fool with the dog with her sheep.

This coming weekend we are going to a seminar that is for total beginners as Shara having the instinct knows more right now than I do about the herding!

The end of April we are signed up for a 2 day working clinic.

This has went well! She now has her first leg towards her HT title at the young age of 11 years!


Check on working Tara in agility

Tara did a 7 week beginning agility class and now we are going to try getting out to the outdoor course close to me a couple of times a month or more.

I am also rejoining the agility club that I used to belong too and let the membership lapse the year that the divorce went through.

I have my membership renewed now and have taken Tara out to the outdoor course a time or two. Hope to take her to a show n go this weekend so she can work someplace new.

Work Frostbyte in obedience

He and I have been going to classes steadily since we started in January. I haven't worked him as much as I should be but he is still doing very well on what he knows.

Have found out that he also enjoys working with the sheep so when time permits will let him do that as well as Shara.

This has not had much progress lately as all the focus has been on getting Shara ready for the Nationals. Getting ready to revamp the dog schedule now that the Nationals are over.


Take Shimmer out more

Have been taking him with me almost every time I go to classes and any chance I get walk him around at new places. He also did one practice track and I think he acted like he will like it as soon as I get more time to work on it!

Shimmer is getting to go out. Still very shy about it but try to get people to pet or feed him when I take him places.


Keep my house cleaner, Flylady here I come.

This just hasn't been happening! I am working on taking small steps to get back to a level that I am comfortable with before going back to focusing on unpacking boxes.

No progress. But making plans.


Keep the shelties groomed better.

Still not as good as I would like but we are definitely doing better than we had been.

About the same, still needs improvement.

Pam

"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned
so as to have the life that is waiting for us"