Let me add that I'm not proud of my snooping (nor, obviously, am I above it... yet). I vowed to myself that once this issue with SM is resolved, I will stop. Unfortunately for all involved, this is not yet resolved. I'm getting closer to my bottom line on this.
Last night S. called and told me immediately of her e-mail and of his "two-line response saying that [friend outside London] was sure to be OK" (as much as five days later is immediately). So, a little lying, and lot of difficult conversation about how he didn't think this "applied" to our agreement since it was about the London bombings and so brief. Well, exactly.
I just told him I was upset and hurt and didn't know how to make any agreements with him anymore, that I didn't know what it meant to him to say "I won't do X" anymore, because it obviously didn't mean he wouldn't do X. I told him I needed some space to tihnk about what this means to me, and he asked me to first find out what it means to HIM, so that whatever I tihkn about will be based on "truth" and not what I believe to be the truth - according to him, some imagined "meaning."
I said I'd think about it, thinking all the while that he is doing it again - making me feel crazy about something he is lying about. Two-line e-mail? About nothing but his friend outside London? I am thinking about asking him to print out his e-mail and bring it to T. Doesn't this need to be settled with all the information on the table?
I don't know, I'm so confused and stung by it I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
