Quote:

he's NOT cleaning his house, packing, or getting ready in any way for the renovations. This translates into a farther out moving-in time, which is hardly acceptable given that I'm going to be 7 months pregnant at the EARLIEST time we can POSSIBLY move in, IF he were on the ball, packing and getting things done to prepare.

I've come to realize that he's not doing it because he doesn't want to. He doesn't want to leave the comfort of his bachelor pad, his haven, the place I'm forcing him to leave because I got pregnant and now his life is changing (my words, not his). I'm "forcing" him to move into one of the other apartments in the house, because it has more room and more light, because it has a space where I can have my home office, because it HAS A KITCHEN, and which also happens to be the most readily rentable apartments (because it will be the first available). He is balking. He wants to rent that one out and take one of the other apts. (so that NEITHER of us gets what he wants? I'm at a loss to understand why).




J, honey - I think I've done this kind of dance with H before, so let me offer a few observations:
- don't ASSume you know why he's doing this. Maybe he's just relieving his stress by hand-crafting the world's finest sawhorses, maybe he's "cramming" ( drives me crazy when my H tries to fit too many things into too little time - and he doesn't always succeed, but you know what? He's proved me wrong a zillion times too when I said he couldn't get it all done in time), and maybe you just aren't listening to his ideas about the apartments so he is being passive-aggressive instead. (Could he be worried about finances and therefore reluctant to move into the apartment that might bring the highest rent?)

I know it's hard to fight that nesting instinct, but you ARE sounding ever-so-slightly control-freakish about this (takes one to know one ). After all, it is NOT the end of the world to move into an apartment in the last months of pregnancy - military wives do it all the time. Just line up some reliable friends (like H2H!) to be on call for your unpacking crew when it does happen. I've found that, hard as it is for me, if I just let go of the wheel and let H steer sometimes, we actually DON'T crash off the road!

So - how about validating the heck out of SO, letting him decide about the apartments, telling him you trust him to make a nice home for the three of you, take the pressure OFF - he can't decide to be happy about all this until you stop pushing him to be. I'm guessing he'll be besotted with his own baby once he meets him/her. Until then - be leary of becoming the maternity version of a Bridezilla.
Ellie