You must insist on complete accountability from your H re: OM. ASAP. Make him open all of his emails sent. Make him share his cell records. Don't give him any other option than complete accountability. His email was inappropriate. Don't say another word about the sitch until you can stand over his shoulder and watch him open the email folder, or open it on your own. If his sent email folder is empty or has only a few entries, that is a red flag. If he won't share the cell record, another red flag.
Get the book "Not "Just Friends"", by Shirley Glass ISBN: 074322549X . Read it, and let H see it (thanks NOP) That was when my W started getting a bit shiftier and more nervous.
Don't feel compelled to use quotes around OW. She is an OW, regardless of the nature of the R. "No contact" is not a necessity if she didn't respond to H, and if it was an isolated incident. But steps would need to be taken to be sure.
Realize that I am no expert. I was LD, W was HD. We both made mistakes, and now things are dangling by one frayed strand of hope. I have received enough help from these kind folks to save my life from emminent destruction. I now see the hope in the morning, noon, and night.
