Quote: I felt stupid asking the question - it feels like it reduces the whole issue to putting X's on the calendar - but he said it was a good one. He paused and said "every other day" (and this man is a senior citizen)
Our situations have many similaraties, some differences too.
If I were asked the question with the intentions from Wife/BB (also a dog lover) to make changes, I would be thrilled. I consider what you did, a big step. Let go of the ideas of putting X's on a calander and more like planning a minature private birthday suit party.
I agree with posts concerning lists or talking about what you need like more closeness and non-sexual attention. He can learn to do this if it is broken down into small steps (Ex 4 hugs a day, 20 second each). Things like this are difficult to do if he thinks the W will chicken out when it comes to his needs. BTDT myself. I did many of the little things mostly to be talked out of the sex at the end of the day. Too tired now, you should have started sooner, I have a dentist appointment tomorrow at 10AM, and on and on. Why try sometimes?
Nooners and afternoon delight: I have those thoughts too. I would not feel rejected if I got a true offer to to connect at some more appropriate time. Most offers for some other times is really a brush-offs with the hopes that the sexual tension will go away. I am not wrighting so you understand me. I am writing this to say how your H "might" feel or from another (senior citizen too) man's point of view. I could list more of my wants or desires but will not now, because this is your thread.
BB is not much of a book person either. So not all guys refuse to read books. People are people with a mix of behaviors that are gender stereotypes and a reverse of the stereotypes.
