My H and I have been married over 30 yrs and have always had some issues around his HD and my LD. But when our kids were around life was often so hectic that we were both too tired anyway. Now H is semi-retired and the problems seem greater. He is upset that I don't initiate often enough and upset that we only do it once a week, twice on a good week - but unfortunately it's just not on my mind as much as on his. He has some ED which makes each encounter a challenge for him and each failure a depressing blow. (Aside from viagra, his Drs have not been very helpful). We've been together a long time and share a lot of history and love, but he talks about needing to find another woman. I accidentally found that he recently sent a very suggestive email to a W friend of ours. He said it was nothing, just words, just a stupid male fantasy. I felt it was a verbal pass and a violation of our trust. We are both very upset. I don't know how I can work on LD if it just isn't on my mind.
There are many wise, empathetic and funny people here: you are my buddies - I'm grateful for your support.
