Looking backward...but only to move forward FOUR

[sage]

Hey, I was on page two!!! I can't remember the last time I was on page two in Piecing!

So, I started my new job this week -- it was very good, but stressful -- lots of new information and new personalities and new culture to grab hold of. It's amazing to me how much calmer I am about this sort of insecure time now, though (much more so than I would have been years ago). I'm not sure if it's the DB'ing or the meditation or just getting older or the other work that I've done but whenever I faced a scary sitch this week I was really calm about it and thought "Look, I've succeeded at this kind of stuff before...I'll just be myself".

I'm just not sure how much time I'm going to get online. I can't access the BB from work and the day is long. I'm trying to get about 20 mins in the AM to be on the computer but it just doesn't feel like enough time to contribute. I may have to pick a thread a day to follow . I think it will get easier as I get more used to my schedule and get a bit more organized.

Things at home are good. H has been unbelievably supportive of the new job and all that goes with it. He's doing great at work too. I have noticed that I get tense when I first get home from work but that's actually nothing new. I think it's because we're on two different frequencies when I arrive -- I'm just walking in the door and want 10 minutes to just decompress and be quiet together (or alone) and he's been home for an hour already and has already relaxed and he's peppy and jumping around and all. I may need to just retreat for a few minutes when I first get home (though I don't want to give the impression that I"m not happy to see him) or even pull over for five minutes or so on the way home to just really relax and meditate.

I'm reading a pretty good book that I'd recommend -- it's supportive and reminiscent of DB'ing (he even mentions Michele) -- it's called "All you need is love and other lies about marriage" by Jacobs. If I get a chance I'll post some notes from it but a couple of things that he does a great job with are the notion that one partner changing (US!) can make a huge difference in the M and also lots of thoughts about showing appreciation for your partner's efforts. I think it's a nice supplement to DR.



Sage