Quote: I want to stress that I'm not thinking anything is going on -- not in any way -- and h is clearly trying to talk about ff to make me more comfortable, he's asked me to be there while they're studying and goes out of his way to be loving, etc. I can FEEL that it's not the same. But I'm still tired and scared and sad inside sometimes...it just brings back that godawful time when h was lying his gd head off to me everyday and I KNEW it. When he turned into such a monster.
First - if he's offered for you to join him when they study - then DO IT. Nothing like a highly visible wife to help deter potential OW.
Second - perhaps it would help you to use a technique H and I use. We refer to our old selves as our exes. H is my NEW husband - that rat who lied to me before is my ex. It's okay to be mad about the things my ex did, but not to blame my "new" H for them. And it's true - we have both changed in substantial ways, we are no longer the same two people.
