Sorry to pop in on your thread, but I may shed some light on this and you on mine. I know the anxiety you feel too well. My W is in same boat as your H. We are only 2 weeks in after she was "caught" big time!
I believe the only true way to combat the anxiety is to have complete faith that they are there and honest. It is tough going through everything and having that trust violated. H is showing signs that he is aware of what your going through and not rubbing you nose in it. He is sharing his "encounters" with you to allow you no speculation. the invitation to study is huge, but not as huge as you declining. You showed great trust in him when you did that! Good for you.
As a male who went through the guilt of all this (mine was non physical and way long distance) he will be very unsure of how to approach you. He does not want to seem overly committed while being that way (if that makes sense). Remember us males are grunters and action takers. We do not do hints and subtle clues well not give them. Take his action as true and valid. They are the "man way" of communicating.
When you come up with the cure to the anxiety, let me know. I will order a double shot!
Through honest giving of my love I will recieve 10 fold in return.
Just because a person does not love you in the way you want, does not mean they do not love you!
