Well, I had a dream last night of a red rose and then this morning I woke up and found myself singing the nuersery rhyme, 'little bo peep' - you know the words, 'little bo peep has lost her sheep an doesn't know where to find them, leave them alone and they'll come home wagging their tags behind them'
LEAVE THEM ALONE AND THEY'LL COME HOME.
I take this as a hint from my subconscious, so I'm doing what the song says and leaving them alone so they'll come home.
Roses in dreams also symbolise love (I have had dreams which come true since age 13 which is why I believe in God. I didn't believe in anything prior to that) so I don't believe it is over yet.
Either that or it means I will meet somebody else. But for now I am dark on them and will see if that works. It did do all the other times, I might just have to give him a little while.
I've made a few decisions though. I've stopped our SL altogether and won't allow it unless he remarries me first. I think in some sitchs, sex is good for estranged partners but in my case, with this going on for so long, I feel it becomes a habit and I'm sure H is under the impression he could get it no matter how he treats me - it doesn't foster respect so that is a complete no no now.
If he asks for sex again I shall tell him we will on our wedding night. Otherwise I'm not trying on this R anymore.
I've also emailed H's father and told him everything to expose the way he treats me to his family so that he will have to face up to his actions. I spoke at length with ex-ow on the same issues.
I'm not worried about telling people at all; he needs to have more respect for me before anything can develop.
Lou, definitely do your back exercises and go and buy some fresh fish which is good for joint and back pain.
Gabriel - try to see your D as just a piece of paper. It cannot obliterate your M. You were buying family passes and she liked that. Don't give in to negative thoughts, try the STOP sign technique.
You have more chances than me as you get on well with your W and parent your S5 together. No one knows what is going to happen in the future or what our partners will do. It is only over once you decide you've had enough of trying, and by the time that happens (which it might not) you probably won't want her anyway.
I think my H is pushing me to that point and I will probably have gone passed it by the time he admits his feelings.
