that does bother me a bit - not him but that behavior with DBing - that a huge complaint of his was that I didn't talk to him enough or open up enough to him - but in DBing I'm not supposed to talk about R - but it's R that's the problem that is making me miserable, and when he asks me directly I have to be vague, which is "more of the same" for me - ? Am I making this too complicated? It really does concern me.
It may very well be that you being communicative is a 180 of your relationship pattern with him, but that's when you're in a committed relationship and NOT dealing with an affair. So you have to incorporate that little annoying fact of life into DB, and that means, NO relationship talk. Be communicative about other things.
CAN I cuss her out if she calls when I'm here? Please, please?
I wouldn't advise answering the phone. Look, this has got you on pins and needles every time the phone rings, or everytime you check to see if the phone rang. How can I put this? OK, so... there's this OP. Now if that OP had died ten years ago, there would be another OP. There, that's succinct. It's not really about the OP, they're interchangeable. They're fed the revision history by the WAS, so they see themselves as white knights (knightessess?) rescuing poor, poor WAS from the evil ogre. So, why play into that and cuss her out and actually live the part, at least for the duration of the phone call, of the evil ogre and make the OP believe the WAS's horror story even more so? Aside from gushing your feeling by venting, which only has a superficial relief period of a few minutes anyway, what GOOD comes out of that, I ask you?
