I do notice that when I was scheming and conniving to get my W to F me, I put her on a kind of weird pedestal sexually. I neglected any blemish on her. Now that we are more intimate, I am not so "hot" for her, though I love her more. I love that fact that we can fight again. We can be sarcastic and darn near hurtful and, instead of it spiralling into uncontrollble anger, we burst out laughing.
I still get hurt when she rebuffs me in bed, but I don't let it ruin my day. And I don't retaliate. But if she burns the spaghetti again, I'll let her have it, and that will be OK.
I know your comment on "not having strong feelings" was speculative, but it sounds kind of sad. I think the folks have got it right who said that you take the good with the bad. Something could happen Wednesday that will reaffirm for your just how strong those hidden reserve feelings are.
