A possible solution that might help - I got this out of DR or DB, can't remember which (both are good, Faith, but DR is usually recommended as the better of the 2, and I agree with that, too.)
Arrange a set time for you and your husband, once a week, a 1 hour block, where you can ask any questions you want to about the A, etc., and he will give you time to ask your questions, and will give you honest answers about anything you want to know. But then you HAVE to limit your discussions and questions about the A to the designated time.
This does a couple things - it frees him up so that he knows that when it isn't that "talk time," he isn't going to have to be wary of the questioning. It might also help you to realize that during the parts of the week that is not your "talk time" you ARE able to hold your tongue. I think it might help you to realize what is a question that REALLY needs to be asked, and can wait until "talk time" or what really doesn't need to be asked, and was just you looking for reassurance.
Good luck. Sounds like you're doing ok. At least he's back. Still lots of work to do.
