Thanks for your advice. You both sound like old hands at dealing with "those" kinds of guys, and understand so well what it is we are up against. It's as if any compromise or kindness on our part really is perceived as weakness, to be fully mined. I see evidence of this in quite a number of places on this board - where women are hopelessly trying to appease full blown narcissists and others with disorders.
I think it is really important for us to examine how our relationships were even well before the bomb.
The wierd thing is, I didn't think I had a "bad marriage", but looking back there were so many screaming red flags of something not quite right.
I will practice saying "no" in the mirror, and to various objects as I go around attending to my chores today. I am finally re-organising and clearing out my office to make it into a truly pleasant and funtcional work space. So I can get cracking on my work!
I was forced to get my bike trailer out and functioning again so as to go pick up some cheap office furniture from the local supermarket which had a really good deal. So I feel like I am accompishing stuff this weekend.
Have a good weekend all!
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
