Hi I left out an important detail. The NPD was first mentioned during MC. H didn't stick around long enuf to confirm this with C. No one is more important to H than H. I still would appreciate more info. It is easier to detach when there is a feasible reason for his behavior--other than it is my fault, still.
I've been off the BB for a few days, and since I might be a little busy with the audit tomorrow, I want to stop by and wish you a..... [drumroll, please]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
Hope D gives you lots of hugs and kisses and my best for a fun one. You deserve it!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
**************************************************************** **************************************************************** .............. How wonderful - a birthday party! .......
Here's a testament to the power of habit. I have the habit of making things OK, and facilitating, always have done in our R.
H rings this evening, and actually SINGS "Happy Birthday" to me over the phone!
But of course he has to signal that it's not to be taken too seriously, by singing very off key towards the end. He has quite a nice voice actually, and can most CERTAINLY hold a tune. So what's up with that? It was most interesting to observe. The slight 'sabotage' effect...
Anyhow, I thanked him, and he asked me if I had done anything special, and I said not. He asked it I felt any older at 45, and I said, not really! He sounded surprised at my answer.
Then he said, no more grey hairs?
I said, I don't know, whatever grey hair I have (and I am fully and prematurely grey/silver - used to get lots of reactions to my "stunning" look ) is hidden by hair dye these days...
H asked, what colour ARE you these days?
I said, the same as when you saw me last!
He said, but what colour was that? (very interesting all this...)
I said, dark brown/black.
He said, oh yes, I know, I approve of that! (Eh? He imagines I am still seeking his approval, evidently!)
Then H said, I am coming down on Friday (I guess it is to then catch the bus/get a lift up for the weekend to friend's place) and I want to meet you for lunch! (The Royal Command!)
Sneakily, I asked, so you want to TAKE ME OUT TO LUNCH?
H sounded taken aback, said, well that would be a bit extravagent... (eh????? Always the best for H!)) but I suppose I could if we went to the Chinese place (very cheap but good value... nearest eatery to D's school).
I said, OK. (Oooooh, I feel spoiled!!!)
Then this is the part where I stupidly offered to pick D up from school and take her to the Chinese place and we could meet there. This will create a precedent and H will come to expect it as of right. Just you watch.
I was fairly sure H would ask (command!) me to join him for lunch (Being just with a nine year old can be, for a self absorbed person, a little tedious?) and I was undecided as to whether I would accept. So I played it by ear, and in the event I accepted.
I guess I do have to deal with the guy for years to come, so while I don't want us to be in each other's pockets, it doesn't harm to spend some time and a few occassions together, especially with D there too. In a detached kind of way.
I will keep you informed.
Goodnight all, thanks for the birthday wishes!
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
Betsey 
