Honey - I think I need this too. I didn't think so, but I want to be wanted beyond all comprehension. I think that any man that is ever with me will have a life altering experience. I want him to think of nothing else than of the next time we can be together and make mad passionate love together. Earth shattering, shaking the rafters, passionate, toe curling love. Whew. And the more I think about it, the more I want it and the more I am devastated that I can't have it. I think I must have reached my limit here and I don't want you to go there. I want you to love your man and love yourself and just be.

I made a stupid mistake today and asked him if anyone had ever told him what a stupid idiot he is for screwing up our lives so bad. Like I'm some fantastic prize and any man not happy to be with me must be brain dead. But that's the way I felt. Like he should be so enamoured of me that he couldn't even THINK of another woman.

Different scenario, I know, but I see couples together and think to myself, "Don't screw it up. Cherish each other. Love each other. Do whatever you can to keep this precious." The alternative is heart wrenching, like your heart is being ripped from your body.

I want to be cherished. I want to be the one and only. It kills me to hear him talk to me about her and I told him so today. "Please, I know I asked you to be honest with me, but I do not want to hear about her or your relationship with her."

I know I'm new here, and not really one of the group, but please listen. Whatever you have to do, hold it together, because the alternative is hell.

Each experience in life has formed me, become part of me, made me stronger.