Cally, Ugh. I hate getting into religious convos on a bb, but yes, he (and I) view oral to completion or handjobs as sinful.
Obviously my own convictions about these things are much less strong than his. In fact, if I wasn't married to him, I can say for certain that I would be doing these things. However, I am married to him and my own faith has grown a LOT because of this.
So there is a bit of sick irony in the fact that the only thing that hurts me is actual penetration and that is the only thing that MrHP will do, anyway.
Wow I am not downing it, but have never heard that any denomination considers this a sin. You learn something new every day.
Does that mean just to completion? Or can foreplay happen before sex? Also then does he consider masturbation a sin also because that would be to completion?
Cally, Yes you got it. The Catholic church is a very life-oriented organization. That doesn't mean that its members need to each have 15 kids but if any sex is takin' place, it had better be in the 'normal' routine of man ejaculating into woman. If people want to restrict the number of kids they have, they should abstain during fertile times.
This has been perhaps the most bitter pill I've had to swallow since H rediscovered his spiritual roots, so to speak.
However, I'm ok with it now. I just find it ironic and sorta cruel, lol, that this is happening. Hopefully by this time next week, I'll be on my way to recovery.
Quote: MrHP considers any sex that is not penetration to be a mortal sin.
God help him if he ever develops erection problems. My late H was completely impotent due to diabetes contracted (according to the army) as a result of exposure to agent Orange in Viet Nam (he later had penile implant), and current bf has erection probs due to circulation issues. What would your H do in such a situation? Accept that it is God's will that he give up sex? Don't mean to sound sarcastic... honestly, how would he deal with a health issue that affected his erection?
HP, you've been doing so well throughout this ordeal. Try to get back into that positive space, focus inward and try not to let the discomfort, pain and lackanookie get to you. There's plenty of time to deal with all that after you get better.
Good luck with the surgery. We are all pulling for you.
HP. I am not being critical of your position on MB or anything other than "normal routine" is wrong. I could not do it without going crazy.
The little SL that we have as a married couple is causing problems and with out any other individual or joint outlets I thinl I would have to live on a deserted island and live like a crazy man. Practicing other forms of sexual release keeps me from getting nutty, mean, or what ever might happen. I have no designs on any other woman as I think cheating is wrong, but nothing but "normal routine" is way too drastic for me.
HP, absolutely no put downs intended, so please don't think I am suggesting you change anything. I am just trying to imply how un happy I would be in your religious state if I were a man or a woman and something happened to my partner that prevented the "normal routine" from happening.
Have you read any of the web sites about ED or some of the female no desire sites? So many sad tales, especially if people would consider some of the aids and techniques available for at least some sexual fullfillment.
After reading some of the sites, Boobs went from being sexy to time bombs just waiting to take a womans life, same with female repoductive organs. Sorry, that last senrence was not intended to depress anyone, just to show people, life has no Guarantees. Maybe some day consider Lill's question or example. I don't think God intended people to hold the Hershey bar and not take a bite when times are tough. KWIM?
HP hope things get back to normal for you and H, and real soon.
I hung out with Catholic, Southern Baptist, Mennonite ( black bumper type where chrome on a car is sinful) and Seventh Day Adventist famalies when I was a kid. I could not comprehend some of their beliefs.
Later in life I was in some group counseling with "Recovering Catholics" to hear all of the comments about NFP. The almost universal comment was "If the Pope/Church wants to do the 2:AM feedings and change all of the diapers that then they would listen to the churches ideas on NFP.
I moved and where did I move to? Mormon country. Boy, now I am confused.
Not intended to discourage anyone from living out their chosen religion.
