Dave, I feel myself getting into a bad space where I am wanting to be controlling and tell him what to do, etc, that's why I started writing all this here so that I can get it out of my system and keep my yap shut tonight.
If he wants to be more sexual, I'm presuming he will do so. I have asked him many times to work on that, and he has said he would. So far, I see little tiny signs that he is trying but many more times of deafening silence, so to speak.
I need to search back in the archives and find the book Corri told me to read long ago about expectations and how to ditch em. As a woman, I think it is perfectly reasonable to expect that my H be turned on by me when it has been weeks since our last sexual encounter and I'm trying to seduce him. He doesn't feel this way and feels that he does "desire" me (I put it in quotes because I seriously do not understand what desire means to him, if not physical desire..ie, hardons and such) but will wait until I say "I want you to do xyz".
I want him to be overcome with desire and approach me with abandon.
See all the expectations I'm harboring?
I have to tell you folks that I am realllllllllllllllll good when having regular sex. Hell, I'm a regular marriage therapist, move on over MWD! But put me in a celibate situation with a guy who flat out ignores me, and I turn into a quivering mass of idiocy.
I'm off to take a hot shower and collect myself before H gets home. I'm turning this day around if it's the last thing I do.
