Generally, you do not want to instigate OR talks when you are at the last resort, when you come off begging and pleading. And you don't want to get baited, if your partner is trying to take things on a downward spin.
If you are in a place where you think you can talk about improvement in the relationship....give it a shot.
Example......My partner and I had been sailing along very smoothly for a good 6 months or more, and then had a blowout. We recently discussed our pursuer/distancer issues......and it is not like this thing started out the right way. But he was able to come up with an idea that when we are in the thick of the stress, gives me comfort AND him space.
He had to have space first to get to this point.
If one of your issues for your W is that you never initiate these things and never try to improve the relatonship from that angle......it may be a sign of love for her when you try.
Test the waters. If it works....great. If it doesn't work, then it doesn't mean it's over......it's just good information for the future.
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
