Hope#2 (for a second I thought you were another Hope on this board),
Yes, I think my H is amazed that my changes are real and such a part of my personality. I think he truly feels that I love him to continue treating him with love and respect after everything he did to me in the divorce.
Continuing with my changes after the divorce just helped me prove he was wrong about me even more.
He is in awe of the changes I have made because he knows it wasn't easy for me to do. While we were married, I must have heard him state, "past behavior is an indicator of future behavior" 1000 times when discussing politics, criminals and events in the media. During our divorce he constantly told me, "people don't change." I have proven him wrong, and he is starting to change his thinking. Plus, he wants to be forgiven for his mistakes too.
We were actually talking about someone who had cheated on their wife a while back and he said, "once a cheater, always a cheater." I told him that I didn't believe that theory any longer. I told him that people evolve and grow during their lives, realize there mistakes and want to be better people. He retracted what he had said and told me that maybe I was right and he was wrong.
I went off on a tangent here, but I wanted to drive it home how much my H has changed his thinking. He lived and breathed the motto that people don't change throughout his life. For him to see my changes, believe they are real and be proud of my accomplishments, DBing has created a miracle in my life. I think the stuff we get from this board is so powerful.
I have told my mom about this website, and she teases me and calls me a nerd for coming here. When good things happen between me and H, I say, "it is because of my DBing." She just rolls her eyes and laughs. Real quick, it is a miracle that my mom is supportive of me and H getting back together. She wanted to kill him, and I think she fantisized about doing it. This is just more proof that time heals all wounds and melts all anger.
