I have finally got a new computer - couldn't cope at all with posting on H's lap top. this one has a french keyboard so until I hook up an english one zill be brief.
The last month has been great mostly, interrupted by me drinking too much and launching an attack, then waking up following morning full of remorse and resolve never to do it again. After my last apology to H for behaviour he said that it was better for me to vent my spleen rqther thqn keep it in and he was very understqnding.
The other night at supper Dd 14 brought up skiing. This is still a topic which makes my heart pound. After the meal I gave H a hug and he said that the mention of the mountains makes him feel ill. Knowing that its not only me zho is having a reaction is calming and reduces my anger.
Children are all back at school on Monday and we have a week off from paying guests so uninterrupted time together. I know he isn' brqve enough to raise issues and don't know if it is timely or still too soon - I don't want to always be the one to bring them up.
He wants me to help him carve his sculpture. This is a first. I have plenty to do and have never had any desire to cqrve wood but perhaps it will be bonding.
