I don't have anything new to report. I was just catching up on everybody's thread tonight and reading new ones. Something just hit me all of a sudden. All the pain, all the heartache, all the sadness everyone has gone or is going through. I feel for everyone and it just brought all my heartache and tears back. I've been looking at our family albums, and I see all the happy memories we've shared. Trips, family events, our honeymoon. Those were good times. Then I came across more recent pics, and I can see how H seems unhappy and distant. No smiles, no joy, no kind of emotion.
I felt the need to call H to let him know that I miss him, so I did. I left a simple little message on his voicemail (his phone was off) telling him so. H did call the house earlier to see how I did in the tournament and to talk to the boys. That was basically it. Well, that was the second "IMY" message I've left him since he's been away. H hasn't said any "ILY"s in awhile, and lately when we've talked with each other, H just sounds so upset and irritated all the time. I know I'm not supposed to take it personally, but it's just so hard not to sometimes.
I felt like I needed to get this stuff out, and I wish I could be of more help to all of you. You have all been so tremendously supportive, and I am forever grateful. Thank you for always listening and just being there.
JV
Valerie
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown
