Quote: 1. I wouldn't discuss h or your sitch with MIL or frankly anyone else in your family...
You ARE right. I even had a feeling that I should have paid attention to about not talking with MIL about this. I should have known better from past experiences that words often get twisted around, so it wouldn't surprise me if that was the case here.
Quote: If your h is feeling controlled, look for ways that you are, in fact, controlling him. It can be very subtle.
Your example was right on target. It was like many of our convos.
Other times H possibly perceived me as controlling was when he suggested going snowboarding, boogie-boarding, or to basketball games. If he wanted to go snowboarding, I usually said no thanks, I just didn't want to. If it was boogie-boarding, I said I would rather just relax on the beach (plus I'm not the greatest swimmer). I like basketball, but I wasn't up for going to see one.
If all is somewhat well when H gets back from AZ, I'll suggest we go snowboarding before the snow's gone. This is something H has wanted me to try with him for a loooong time. He already knows how to, but he has wanted me to go with him.
Thank you, Sage.
Valerie
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown
