It wasn't exactly a happy goodbye. Things have felt quite edgy since this morning. I don't know why. Probably because H was rushing/stressing to get his things together - I told you he always waits until the last minute!
The kids got very warm, enthusiastic hugs "goodbye". I wish I could say the same about mine. H seemed distant and unfeeling. On his way out the door, I asked if I could have a kiss. I almost wish I hadn't. It was empty and cold with still lips from H. Before he left, I said, "I'm sorry, H. I'm sorry for everything." H said, "Me, too." I told him to have a safe trip then we said bye.
I think I made the right decision for us to not have any contact while H is away although I now all of a sudden have a feeling that this could hurt me. I'm thinking, "What if H finally makes the decision to leave when he returns?"...... Well, time to get crackin' with BIG time DBing! I really want to be prepared for whatever occurs when H gets back in a week or so.
Thanks for listening, everybody!
Valerie
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown
