As far as the solo activities, it is just that everything he does once he gets home is alone. And it is not 20 to 30 minutes of unwinding. It is pretty much all evening. He takes hour long bike rides, plays drums from 15- 30 minutes (sometimes a few times an evening), is on the computer from 30 minutes-hours. He sometimes does all these things in the evenings. He only see the family at dinner. I don't have a problem with him doing somethings by himself. I really don't. At the moment, it just feels more like he is avoiding us. But, I am not saying anything about it and just acting as if. I must say I am playing with and enjoying my kids so much more. This has opened my eyes to what is important. If he doesn't want to be a part of that, I can't change it. But, it is his loss.
The church thing I only brought up once (last Sunday) and it was in response to a statement he made. I have not and will not bring it up again. I know I can't make him go or change him. Believe me, I understand that. I was pleased that he did make an attempt to go. I did not comment on it at all yesterday even when meeting for lunch. I will continue to go and take the kids.
I am definately not pursuing him at this point. I pretty much do my thing. I only concern him with dinner and lately that is just to see if he is hungry and wants what we are having (which is a 180). I don't think he sees too many if any of my behaviors as pursuing at this point. My focus is on me and the kids.
He did thank me last night for doing the laundry. It was a huge chore. It had piled up from last week. So when he put his clothes up, he realized how much there was and thanked me.
I don't know if he is making his way back and right now I am not worrying about it. Right now I feel like I will be okay either way. He has a lot of things to sort out.
So, I keep going one day at a time. Patience and God will get me through this.
