D, as long as I keep my emotions in check everything is fine. His reactions (extreme ones anyway) are usually in response to me. I am not saying it is right, but that is how it is right now. I am hoping counseling will help.
Sporster, I know that keeping my mouth shut isn't a solution. I am just willing to do that for now, until school is out. I will regroup then. My kids have seen and heard to much, unfortunately. I want the last five weeks of school to be as normal as possible for them. We will see what is to happen then.
To everyone else, I can express enough my gratitude for your concern. Sun, you are right, we are family. Even though I haven't posted much on my sitch or anyone elses, I have been reading and keeping up with all of you. I just haven't felt like I have much to offer right now.
I will work on my PMA. GAL will be hard because I don't think I will leave the kids with H right now. So anything I do, they will do to. Gotta get back to the gym, been too long. I will also start looking for positives again. And most definately, continue to detach, which I think I have down. It didn't upset me too much when I left. I got more upset this weekend at what this did to his family and their support for me. It visibly upset his parents and aunt. They are very disappointed. They stood up to him and told him so much of what I have already said. Hopefully, he heard some of it, since it didn't come from me. He really respects his parents.
So, positives... H gave me a hug and kiss last night when I went to bed and he stayed up to do his grades. He woke when my alarm went off this morning and I got another hug. I went out with a friend..okay we took the kids to McDs but I didn't get home until 8. H had been napping (he stayed up late to do grades) and woke up when we got home, came out and talked for awhile. Sunday night he came out and joined the fam as we watched a movie (one of my gripes is that he doesn't spend enough time with us--all his hobbies are done alone).
Beth, I will check out that website. I need all the help I can get!!!
Russ, you hang in there, too.
NY, I hope you are right.
Soccermom and JV, thanks for keeping tabs and checking in.
