Sherry GAL time, It works, Like you said H was noticing. Guyes see small things two. Sometimes we need the truck to hit us. But when we think we are going to lose the bus, we run.
GO TO THE GYM. Have you found a run to enter? Do it. dare ya. double dare ya.
Sherry I'm glad for you and want you to be strong.
I am glad that H is back home. But I worry for one reason only and I dont want you to take this the wrong way. My H has said NUMEROUS times that he would end it with OW, and never did. So the big question is, will H linger about ending it with her, and keep on living with you, and then you find out he never ended it. If you continually ask about it H will get mad. I am worried for you in that respect. I do think it was GREAT that he came back home, but just like in my case, H should of ended it with OW before doing so.
You know H better than any of us, so I am not trying to sound negative. For right now just continue on the path that you have, and re-evaluate in a few weeks. I am pulling for you Sun
Very insightful. That is what I am struggling with right now. I just posted that on piecing.
I am so scared that he won't end it and he is stringing me along again. Part of me thinks, he will end it. That he knows I will move on with or without him. Part of me is scared I will be back to square one. I can't handle that.
Right now I feel numb and empty. The wierd thing is that H seems to be trying here at home and I just can't focus on that. Yesterday he had a Dr. appt. He called on the way. He texted while he was there twice. He called on the way home. He didn't do this before. So part of me thinks he is trying to reassure me.
We went out to eat last night and had a good time--playful, laughing. We went and looked at bikes. H wants a new one.
I am very confused right now.
Thanks Russ, I am still going to the gym and GAL. I have to. Right now is hard because we only have one car (one was in the shop). I am nowhere ready to enter a run. I only walk on the treadmills. I have never been a runner. I have been doing more weight training to firm up. You enter a run for me!!
How are you doing? What about the custody issues? Sherry
I am, how about IM Canada, do not enter til Aug 28? Have to line up at about 4:00AM pay my $600.00. And train for 12 months to be ready. But hey I have nothing but time.
As for you, you do not run a fun 5 or 10KM race, you run/ walk. Run 2 minutes, walk one....Next week run 3 minutes, walk one.....After that runs become longer till about 10-12 minutes and you will notice the walks are getting shorter and longer apart or like me not needed. The hardest thing to do about a run is signing the entry.
You are a teacher, right. So I'm thinkin you can write better than most. Imagine the thoughts of H as he hears you have entered a race. Challange he to enter. My kids love to come and cheer. They even enter some short races.
I am pulling for you Sherry. YOU are pulling H out of his funk. KEEP IT UP.
I don't think H has had much if any contact with ow since returning home on Tues.
But, tomorrow spring break is over and we head back to work and I believe he will resume talking to ow.
I have been struggling with feelings I haven't had in a loong time. I had gotten to the point where I wasn't obsessed with H and ow. It is in my head all the time. I am hoping going back to work will help with that. Why do I seem to be going backwards here?????
I look back on the last 4 days and think why didn't I make those the best days so when he did return to work it would be good thoughts about us. No, the last several days have been h---. I have had a rollercoaster of emotions and not a lot of control. You know what they say about hindsight.
I had bags packed on Saturday and was ready to leave on several ocassions. H was actually telling me not to go, using the kids to make me feel guilty. But, he can't end it with ow quickly and won't tell me how long it will take. He says he wants to end it mutually. I am having a hard time with that. He won't answer any questions about what his contact with ow will be now that he has chosen to come home. My thoughts on Saturday were we needed to be separated longer than one night. He came home on Tuesday sounding sorry, saying he needed to stop being a coward (he used a different word that I won't use here on the baord). I haven't seen too much of that man since. I am afraid of ending right back up where I was.
I can feel the pain in your post, only because I was in that same spot when my H (seperated at the time this past summer) came to me and said he wanted to work on our M. I was elated as you were when H returned the next day and asked immediately about him ending it with OW. Needless to say my H never did end it. So in turn I was on an emotional roller coaster, trying to figure out the contact they were having etc. I fear that you are going backwards in that respect. One night apart probably was not enough to do it unfortunately. But consider this....H stayed at OW's house that night right? He had to of said that things were over between you and him, blah blah blah. How did he explain moving back home the next day to her??? She may or may not have said something about it, but know this...She knows here R with H hangs on by a string as well. I have that same problem. I know that H has tried a few times to end it with OW, but never sucessful...Why because he doesnt really want to end it, she talks a good game...But so do I...which is why H is still home. So for right now my advice to you is get back on track with detaching and GAL, it was working for you.
I know this post that I am responding to is a few days old, so probably your mood has changed or even new developments so I apologize for being late on my response.
Just know that I am thinking of you, and I feel like right now you and I are in very similar spots in this whole thing. I am here for you Sun
I haven't posted to you in awhile. I have been reading of the many developments though. Girl, I am praying for you. Take a deep breath and try to relax a bit. Let time work it's magic. Know that whatever happens you can and will become better for it.
Emotions get the best of me too. Let's try and not let them control us. That is when we will make the best choices. The outcome to your sitch means a lot to the people on this board. Stay positive and let us know how you are doing.
Thanks for the words of encouragement. I really need them. I guess for now I am really going to detach even more, continue GAL and focus on the positives.
H has done little things lately. He hugged me goodbye yesterday as I left for work. I turned to leave and just said goodbye, but he reached out for a hug. He called today after my Dr. appt to see how things went. Soooo... I will focus on those baby steps and have no expectations.
Man, that's great news! He may be coming around, but be careful...
You've progressed immensely since I started following your situation. Continue please. Enjoy your Friday. Go do something for yourself, even if it's a trip to Coldstone (do they have those in Texas?) for some Ice Cream.
Sherry, I am so happy that things ar looking up for you. Hang in there and keep your guard up a little but at the same time enjoy every moment that you have.
I had a little encouragemnt from H this morning an actual peck on the lips...Youza!
