You can't work on a marriage where three people are involved. You can work on you and the things you can fix. It takes you and your husband to address the needs of your marriage. He is focused on his needs right now, not yours or the marriage's needs.
First off, don't panic. It won't do you any good, it won't fix anything and will only exacerbate the problem.
Go to the book store and pick up three books.
"Divorce Remedy" by Michele "Surviving An Affair" by Harley. "Love Must Be Tough" by Dobson.
For now, keep them from your husband. They are not a secret, but these books are your weapons to fight for your marriage. You don't want him short-circuiting your efforts.
Read them, study them. The information they contain, if applied correctly, can help you save your marriage.
The absolute worst thing you can do, is to stay frightened, and avoid conflict by doing nothing.
Your husband has secrets. He is hiding his activities from you. That is his guilt at work.
Get the books and read before you confront. You know he is doing it. That will do for now.
His trip is very likely an excuse to go meet the other woman.
I wish you all the best, -NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
