Need Some Advice from HD folks-especially men

[haphazard]

I fear I am too late. This problem has overflowed into the emotional side of our M. He now says he feels there is something missing. I can't help but think it all doesn't come back to the ssm. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I want to make it up to him but how. The first week we ML every day and some days even twice. Then all of a sudden it stopped. He said it was like a punch in the nose. Too much at once. He also said that there is nobody else. It bothered him that ML was the only thing we were working on. Although I feel the other issues are directly related. I can understand how he can be skeptical about me changing-but why not enjoy it.

Hi,

I can see a lot of similarities with my H. you have a small D and that takes up a lot of your time (plus job etc) you have been neglecting H. I know I know it feels like huh can't he just be a grown up and accept I can't focus on his needs right now. But that is where my H was and it had gone on for a lot longer than your sitch.

I guess the emotional side has got to him. Maybe at first the ML was great and a salve to his wound but after a week of crazy ML he started to feel like that wasn't all that was wrong, like you weren't paying attention to what else is wrong and maybe just by treating him like someone who just needs loads of sex to keep them happy you aren't respecting him.

Perhaps he feels you have just had this quick fix idea and after all he is a bit more of a complex human being than that. He wants some of your attention and that can include all kinds of things not just sex.

Sweet text messages
Cooking his favourite meal
Little token gifts
Spending time together just chatting about stuff he is into not just whatever is on your mind at the moment.

I don't know if there is OW maybe there is but I can understand that if someone is hurting and feeling their relationship is all wrong then a quick overdose of sex is not necessarily going to fix it no matter how HD they are.

take care

Fran