Yes, I think this is a just happens. I am very worried about Breeze. She still doesn't want to eat which allows her to get weaker and that seems to me to be when she seizures.
Then the money thing is pretty stressful but I can only do what I can do there. We have cut back on all utility usage trying to get those bills lower. Trying to look at other areas as well. I suppose right now my biggest expense is vet bills and has been for some time.
Being down tends to lead my thinking back to D and the past 3 years of H*LL. At least that is what they feel like they were.
So many questions in a way and yet in a way not as he probably doesn't know the answers either. But, he had to have been lying to me a whole lot of the time that I was trusting him still. Was he consciously lying to me or just totally unsure so that was his non confrontational way of handling the situation?
Now I wonder did he love me when he married me or did he only marry me because he thought he had lost Janice and he didn't want to be alone? I hope he thought he loved me and didn't realize it was her he really wanted until he found out she was really leaving G this time unlike last time when she dumped D and stayed with G.
Just all the thoughts and so fuzzy and mixed up and down.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
