Thanks so much for the support.

I think H knows I am serious.
I asked him last night when he would make his decision. He said he didn't know. Surprise, his favorite answer. He did say it was terrifying. Of course he didn't elaborate and I didn't ask. But Easter isn't to far off and I will not go if he has not made a decision. It will be hard for him to explain why me and the kids are not there.

Someone earlier said I did this out of fear. I really don't think fear was the factor. It was more hopelessness with the sitch. Fear has kept me there at home. H has repeatedly told me he needs to see it crash and burn before he can end it. I cannot see how that will ever happen if he just continues talking and not experiencing life and all the stresses everyday brings. H really is not a kid person (found this out after we had kids) and she has 3. H really has a problem with babies, very uncomfortable around them. She just had one.

Sportster, No this really isn't what I want. Like everyone here I want my H back and for him to love just me and for there to be no ow. I also know that I can't handle this summer. We are both teachers and I will wonder everytime he leaves the house if he is sneaking off to see her. He sees her at work and that will not be there for 2 1/2 months. I can't live like that and I can't put my kids through anymore of that either. It makes me a different person and I don't like it.

So, I don't want this but I also don't know what else to do. I feel like I just need to move on.
I have thought about this alot.
As hard as it will be, it is what I need to do.
I hope now H will really start to think about it, not just losing his family but everything else that goes with it.

Anyway I will keep planning and preparing for moving on.
The big decision is whether or not to move me and the kids.

I finally told my mom. Her and her husband were considering moving to be closer to us and to some of his kids. So, id they do move, I think the kids and I will stay here. If they decide to not move, we will move back.

Lots of things to consider. But today I am better, no tears yet. But I am lso at work and that helps.

Thanks--Everyone here is great!!!!!
Sherry