Sherry, I know you acted from the bottom of the rollercoaster ride feeling like you couldn't take another second of it and I know part of you is relieved and part of you wishes you hadn't done it and part of you wonders how this will work itself out...
But you can't back down now and you know that! If you back down, all's lost. He'll forever know that he's got you wrapped and any request you ever make for him to change will never have any force. So now you have to see it through, no matter how it goes.
The ultimatum was the absolute last resort. It's that ultimatums are basically threats, and the motivation for someone to act on an ultimatum therefore is fear (fear of termination of your relationship, in this case). Fear makes a lousy reason to love someone, because you can't compel someone to love you. It will come down one way or the other, and I hope it works for you.
