Confused....just posted here but it didn't show up. One more time.....I'm copying and pasting what I typed in another area. Sorry to not keep all my stuff in one spot.
Well another new low........got turned down in the bedroom. That's not happened since right after H dropped the bomb in Nov. There's been no small pecks or even a hug since the night he told me he wasn't willing to stop calling the OW. After the morning when I told him he had a message on his phone because I heard it beep and told him to tell the OW to make sure and only leave text messages when it's not possible I'd find out, he started turning his phone completely off when in the house. Well, after the talk the other night, he started leaving it on again. I've never read any of the messages. I only have looked to see if it says "new message" on the front. Last night when I went to bed, it said 1 new message. He spent some time in the bathroom (our closet with a dresser where he keeps his phone is off the bathroom) and I got up before him this morning. Needless to say, after I got in bed last night, he read the message and probably replied since when I got up it didn't say there were any messages. Then, we took one of our D's to a movie and when we came out of the bathroom he was putting his phone back on his belt real quick. I stormed off and he knew I was pissed. OK, so now it's like he's not even trying to hide this crap anymore. Does that mean he IS done here trying with me? Then to be turned down tonight was the clincher. I feel awful. When I started to get up out of bed after the rejection he asked, "where ya going?" I just said I was getting back up for a little bit. I finally had worked up the nerve to see if he wanted to ML by saying, "you can lay closer over here with me if you want to". He didn't say a thing for so long and made no move. Then he said, "to cuddle"? I said forget it, never mind. Then that's when I got up. I just don't know where we are on all of this, and I know it only matters where I AM on all of this, but that's such a hard question. Thanks for listening.......yet again.....
