Journaling: Friday night was not so good. We went out with friends and I drank too much and judgement wasn't good. By the time we got home, H was a little ticked off at me. I broke the no touching rule AGAIN. He does not like public displays of affection. I do--so I kept touching him and he kept slapping my hand (gently) and telling me to quit it. I'm just laughing it up and keep picking at him. I should not drink that much!!! Then some friends asked us to meet them Saturday night for dinner and I just jumped right in and said ok without seeing what H wanted to do. He didn't really want to do it, but he felt I locked us into it. He was barely speaking to me when we got home. But we briefly discussed what happened and he reminded me again that he doesn't like the touchy thing (clingy!!!) and that he was embarrassed and annoyed with it.
I was not being respectful of his feelings. I was totally trying to get my own needs met--trying to get his attention. Trying again to make him like being touched, just because I do. But HE DOESN'T LIKE IT (WHACK for me)!
Saturday night we went out again and I was much quieter and didn't touch him at all--just smiled when he looked at me. He actually reached over and touched my leg once! I didn't say anything--reminder: let him initiate touching.
Wow, this can be so hard when you don't feel the same about things as your H does. But I picked myself up and keep moving forward.
