This coming Sunday is the two year anniversary of the bomb, and a few days after that is my forty fifth birthday.
I am organising a meal at a restaurant and hoping a bunch of friends can make it. It will be a celebration of my birthday (won't play up that aspect) but also a new begining and a look to the future!
It is painful to NOT invite H, but I think it is what I have to do. My heart is still tugging me towards him, but my head says it's best to stay aloof from now on.
He rang earlier today. Said he was just checking that D got home OK last night. I said, you would have heard from me by now if she hadn't! He said, well, she got a lift with the Dad of w3's daughter, and also said his phone was not working properly.
Then he asked if I had a nice weekend. I said, yes, thank you. Then he asked where I went. I told him the general area. I was wondering if he would ask who I went with, but he didn't. I would have just said, someone you don't know.
Then there was a slight pause, and we both said, well then, bye for now, and hung up. I felt no urge on my part to chat.
D didn't finish her homework last night and had to get up early and finish it off this morning before school.
One of my projects in the coming weeks and months is learning how to handle her better. How to not always react to her bad behaviour, but to firmly and lovingly call her on it. To set those boundaries.
Goodnight all!
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
