I have that same battle within myself everyday. If I act all happy all the time, let things that would normally upset me go right over my head, doesnt that tell H that I am willing to put up with this? That he can have his cake and eat it too? Then I say, well if I show him our life is too good to walk away from then one day soon he will stop lying and cheating. It is such a confusing time. I have said the words to H a few times that I am not willing to put up with this, but then my behavior doesnt reflect it. But I can tell you seriously I am nearing the end, and that is something only you can decide. When enough is enough. My sitch has been going on just about a yr. It is very tiring, and has definately changed me. Some things for the better because it has forced me to look at things that I may have done to lead up to this, and others for the worse, because I feel I lost a little bit of myself during this.
I keep taking my H's indecision and lack of moving out (even tho he has threatened to do so) as part of him knowing he doesnt want to let go of our R. BUt I will tell you as hard of a time I am having at GAL, it does peek their interest when you are doing what you nornally wouldnt do. Some things for good and others not. I know how you feel, as others here do, and if you get yourself back and do for you, ultimately you will be a better person for it.
Do you think that the birth of your daughter attributed to any of this? I know when I look back now, it caused our life to get into a rutt. I love my D, dont get me wrong and H loves her too, but I think the responsibility finally got the better of him. How does your H interact with your D?
