Quote: Somedays it is very, very hard to act as if, when what I'd really like to do is have a meaningful discussion with him, about how he is coping, about why the spontaneity has seeped out of our relationship. But, none of this will get us closer, so we let sleeping dogs lie, for now. I just hope he is ready soon.
Hi Slowly! I do know how your'e feeling (being a world class talker myself! ), but I gotta remind you that many, many of us around these parts feel we need a "meaningful conversation" to get answers to our questions. And those very same many of us have come to learn that it very often doesn't happen; that it often is the very thing that makes our S's cringe & withdraw - BUT that does not mean we don't get answers or information in other ways....
"About how he's coping" - I think you can SEE that with his sweeping past the touchy bits of news . . . There's probably some more time & processing needed. But he seems to do this best on his own, and when he's ready (if I recall correctly) he does open up to you & reveal little bits.
"About why the spontaneity has seeped out" - Um, ain't that kinda an action thing? Talking about spontaneity is a bit like planning a rash decision, no?
Go girl, add some spice and without expectations of NG jumping in to add his own mix of spice. He just may surprise you when you're not looking - and if not, I'm guessing you're more than able to add the kind of spice that will please both of you!
), but I gotta remind you that many, many of us around these parts feel we need a "meaningful conversation" to get answers to our questions. And those very same many of us have come to learn that it very often doesn't happen; that it often is the very thing that makes our S's cringe & withdraw - BUT that does not mean we don't get answers or information in other ways....
