Lassie, I sooo agree with this. I too thought I was being clear and we were on the same page and he had no clue. After he caught on to what I was saying, there was also the element of his resistance--which then caused him to purposely mis-read what I was saying..what Dr. Schnarch would call marital sadism.
So there were several levels to his not getting what I was trying to say but I found the most success with talking VERY clearly. Saying "sex" and exactly what I was thinking instead of "passion" and trying to clean it up. I now speak in almost graphic terms. This is NOT my personality at all!! But I do it because I want no room for misunderstanding between us.
