Okay LG - now the big question is - what do you want to do, and how do you plan to go about it?
I mean - if you plan to divorce him, then I would suggest that first you gather all your evidence, and that you do a forensic search on the financials (he certainly sounds capable of hiding bank accounts on you.) And squirrel away some cash for yourself for the transition. No point in letting him know about your plans in advance - I'm sure he'd just hide money then.
If you still plan to give him a chance - I'd have all the conditions of treatment etc. written down.
