Quote: What all this boils down to for me is that my H has a much deeper problem than I suspected and it has gone on much longer in our marriage and his life than I suspected, and I believe by the way he continues to treat me that it is still going on to some degree.
If you believe it is still going on - what are you doing to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases? Has he had an AIDS test yet?
Quote: What is glaringly apparent to me is that my H is still not being accountable for his past (and now suspected present) actions, nor has he ever admitted to me that he might have a problem and to what extent it went. I think he is in denial and it is way past time to address this. If he can't come clean with me in counseling, and admit to what he has done and may still be doing, this marriage is over for me.
Can't say I blame you there.
Also - all of BMOWs new guy's stuff about sexual addiction - yes, I do believe there are sexual addicts out there - people with a version of obsessive compulsive disorder. Still, I suspect that most people who hide behind that term are really just looking for another way to escape the consequences of their behavior.
You've been through the wringer, Lost - I know I wouldn't have lasted as long as you have. I think your demand that H come clean and get help or it's a deal-breaker is a pretty healthy boundary to have.
