hi everyone... here i am... back in home after an extraordinary vacation with sons and other famillies, even my h wasnt close and affective with me... but i deffinatelly enjoy it a lot... and the jungle adventure was the best for all of us...!!...
Although i exploded many times, cried, and feel so depress in some moments because his rejections and his answers about that rejection (i dont know why i dont feel pleasure being affective for you ) i was always the most funny and smiling one on the group, the 4 famillies that travel together...! I dnt knw whats happening to my h... i dont know if he will get out of that tormeentous and confused world, i only know i dont know what i will decide or do in the future.. sometimes i wish to push him away and beguin a new life for m and my children... but sometimes i decide to be patience and try to handle his confution until i dont know what decission he will take...
Althugh we laugh and joke a lot... although we share comments and plans for the future... he seems "angry", so "reject type" about me...!... it is like he is obligatting himlsef to be that way with me... WHY?? i am not th guilty for his frustration... the only thing i had done is helping him to attaing his goals and projects... So, let time do his part... by my part i will try hardly to detach from him... being so happy, even i have to obligate myself to be like that, caring abpout myself, and no affections, caring ... i will get apart... i think my dignity as a woman and my self love needs some kind of that accttitude... i had received so many hurting and sadness actions from him that i dont want more...!!... so, i will stay around...
Andrea