GOALS 1- What we will be doing different when we communicate more and better? - He will ask me more about my day, kids issues and my things -He will tell me more about his day and activities
2- What will us be doing different when we were more affectionate? - We will touch and get close when we awake - We will give kiss saying by or hello
3- What we will do different when we enjoy more together? - We will laugh r talk nicely while seing TV - We will put more humour and less seriousness in our talks - We will laugh and share good moments alon or with friends.
WHAT THINGS DONT FUNCTION - Being needy, crying or pledging him bc our R problems - Asking him, agan and again, to be more affectionate, recrimining why we dont make love, etc etc - Reacting to his apaty and bad mood with more apaty and bad mood
WHAT FUNCTION - being happy, always smiling when he is around - Listening him, and dont saying anything even i do not agree with his position - Caring more about myself and my home and kids.. trying his mood doesnt affect too much my cotidianity and activities. - Separating a little from him... leting him a little alone. Geting close and again, leaving him...!!
Thecnincs i will aplay THE LAST RESOURCE: with a lot of 180 1- When he answer icy, hurting, boring i will react laughing, like he answer totally different of the way he answer. For example, a typical one: I ask him anything, like ¿Do you think we need to throw away that furnishure that dosnt work or we not use? He answered saying that the furniture work bu that all th kids and ME dont know how to care about the furniture So... what do you think will be a 180 1- Throwing away the furniture without asking again? 2- Letting the furniture in the meadle of my home 3- Putting the furniture in place and trying to fix them?
2- When he arrive home i use to be on PC.. so, now a- i wont be at home or i will be at home but doing something with my kids.
3- Almost every weekend we do the same.. going out with children to eat or something like that... what do you think will be better as a last resurce thecninc a- doing plans for all differents, like going to beach (maybe he right now isnt so open for this or maybe doing this i will show him too much interst on doing things together b- Doing plans alone, with my kids. (can this acctitude distance us more?)
BREATH, WAIT, BREATH, THINK AN STRATEGY, AND THEN ACT (THATS SO IMPORTANT FOR ME BC I USE TO DESESPERATE AND REACT)
ACTILING LIKE IF.... HE IS FULLLING ME WITH AFFECTION, HE IS SO COMUNICATIVE, HE IS NOT CONFUSED...!!
