Definitely be less available to W and quit complimenting her. I NEVER said anything complimenting to H until after he started complimenting me.
As for these girls, I think if you are serious about wanting to save your marriage you should not see this as a 'date'. Tell the one who is keen on you that you are just getting a D and you don't want to launch into another R but you just want to have a little fun.
If your W found out that anything had happened between you and this girl, she could end up hurt or even if she's not hurt, it might make her think she was right to D you.
When my H found out I was 'dating' (in the year I didn't contact him) he went crazy and was basically nasty to me every time he contacted me for that entire year, which thankfully was not a lot.
Also, one of the guys I had a fling with just couldn't accept that it was just a fling. I told him from the outset, I'm just having fun, this is not an R. I don't want an R etc, but because we slept together he refused to accept I didn't love him and kept saying 'Don't you feel anything at all?' Which meant I ended up having to be nasty and say no I don't love you, you knew that to start with. The concept of women having sex just for fun was too much for him and he ended up hurt.
If you do take these girls out, keep it as just friends, it's much easier and then at least you know it's not a re-bound thing.
