this is very helpful/insightful, Sage (as you always are) I do have to ask about this:
Quote: 3. when I bring up ow, it creates a sense of hopelessness for both h and me.
WHY do you think this is? for the H i mean? The reason I ask it that 2 weeks ago, when I was feeling insecure and said as much, that H got irritated and said "It makes me feel hopeless when you say that"...I told him it wasnt anything in particular he had done, and he seemed to ease up a bit, but I am still puzzling over it in my mind....WHY would HE feel hopeless? to me it seems that he is the one who has control over the sitch, as I've told him EXACTLY what he could do to help me feel more secure (bug-off forever email to ow/cc'd to me, etc.,) and he refuses to do such. Why would anything I say or do make him feel hopeless when he is in the drivers seat?
