I've been so busy today I havent had a minute to post. Thought I'd make some notes, though, and as always I appreciate ANYTHING anyone else "sees" in this sitch. Thank you, Randy and Dawn, for sharing with me! I have to laugh Dawn, I was perfectly happy to settle for H being sick when ow came into the room, other than all "moony/swooney" and ga-ga lovesick looking at her. If SHE happens to make him sick, because of guilt or what ever, ALL THE BETTER in my book, although I have this sneaky suspicion it's just the remnant of this "bug" we've had. Still, ANY negative association w/ow is better than a positive or none, right ; Now if I can just conjure up some way to make H feel sick everytime he sees her!!!!!
So, last night, H had some kind of irritable temper flare-ups. It struck me that he honestly acts a lot like some one who is trying to give up smoking, or some such thing. I can only hope it's related to trying to give up ow.
he just seemed kind of "edgy", yet pleasant enough for supper. I stopped by the house at noon and threw some barbequed brisket in the oven, so my "guys" (H and S) were able to have one of their favorite foods for Monday nite supper...H thanked me for that, and said he appreciated it. He was going to go to the basement to workout ( I notice he is beginning to spend more time doing that, another sign of trying to get over/give up ow?) and I gave him a hug before he left. I said something suggestive/flirty (dont recall what) and he responded likewise, I told him to be careful, because I never run from a challenge, and he got "handsy" (we were in the laundry room, in private)...then he pulled me into the nearby bathroom, and got more "handsy". THAT was a BAD idea because that bath is more of a powder room, way too tiny for ANY activity....and it just didnt work at all. H got irritated, angry and upset...he gets so frustrated if "things" don't work these days, the whole thing is odd, because it's weird for it not to work, and I'm not sure whats going on...So, anyway, we just called it off and he went on to work out. THEN, evidently his treadmill kept shorting out or something, starting and stopping, and H began to throw the most awful yelling, cussing temper tantrums. I just kept on doing what I was doing upstairs, didnt respond, it seemed wisest just to let him blow off steam. I showered and put on a red satin nighty and was in the bedroom when H came up. He wanted to know "why are you wearing that outfit"? (nice to know he appreciates my efforts at nice lingerie) and I told him "it can be easily removed", and he seemed to perk up, and things "worked" just fine then....he actually said "I'm sorry about earlier"...I told him not to think a thing about it, no problem, but find it interested that he was apologizing. Obviously, such incidents bother him.
We were talking about his parents last night at supper, and their involvement (over) with his younger siblings...H commented that "just once I wish it could be about me, just one day, my birthday" I thought that was so weirdly MLC, so telling....and sad. he wasn't angry, just sounded kind of sad and dejected. Sheesh, the guy who made all kinds of work plans to avoid being home on his b-day. Maybe that's part of what he was running from.
I don't know, maybe it's nothing, but he just seems "touchy" and irritable, on-edge, like he IS trying to break the bad habit of ow, yet he is warm, appreciative and for the most part friendly towards me.
This morning I didnt get any email from him, so sent him one right after lunch. He replied saying "thanks" for sending it, and that he'd been really busy. I probably would have freaked that he was lunching w/ow, except that I saw her get out of a car with coworkers in her dept. at the end of lunch, so obviously she wasnt with him here.
; Now if I can just conjure up some way to make H feel sick everytime he sees her!!!!!
