Hey Lassie,
Nopkin's comments reminded me of something else.
For some reason I have a terrible time remembering to give affection to my H. I have a baaaaaad habit of waiting for him to come to me--because he always has??..I don't know. Anyway, in November I made a list of goals and at the very top of the list was XO, standing for hugs and kisses of course. All of the list is in shorthand so that he doesn't know what it is, but this one's pretty obvious. By now, it is habit for me to do this and I would say I initiate about 50% of the affection in our house, which is a huge improvement over how it used to be.

Last weekend I hugged H and told him how good he felt to hug. I said, A while back you asked me to give more affection..so how am I doing?

I gotta tell you, I was expecting him to then extol the virtues of his affectionate wife. His response surprised me. He said, You're doing better.
!!
I said, You mean it's still not enough? I had no idea! I'll try to do more..I was just trying to not smother you, is all. He backpedaled a bit and started making excuses, for me, about the kids and whatnot, but I said No I will try to do more..I guess I just didn't realize how much you liked it!

So then I began experimenting..now this was a little difficult this last week because the kids had rotavirus and were sick sick sick little girls. (Babypot was spared, thank you God) But at one point, I decided to rub his shoulders a bit. He loved it! So I made a mental note that he is in need of general affection and not just x's and o's. He wants physical affection that babies or pampers him.

Now, this is a bit tricky for me since he is a dyed in the wool PITA. Just last night I tried to hug him and he was freaking OUT. Ahhh, it tickles, ahhhh stop...etc. Half the time he is too hot, or ticklish, or he just plain old doesn't feel like it.
But that will not stop me from trying or paying closer attention to times when he does seem to be liking it.

Also, and I swear this is the last thing lol, I have found with him that his words are NOT reflective of what's going on inside his noggin. I may ask him if he wants a backrub and he says no. Now a normal person would think, Ok he doens't want one.
What I've discovered with H is that he (half the time) wants me to pursue him and insist on it. The other half he is really telling the truth. But I figure that I will just pursue him anyway until he learns to tell me the truth the first time. This sounds a little aggressive and counterproductive, but it has good results in encouraging him to practice speaking truthfully about his needs. So I will continue!

Anyway, the point of this long mesg was to say that you might want to make some goals and post them where you'll see them and remember them. I know how distracting kids can be and I can't imagine an 18 mo old whirlwind of a baby boy.

For me, I will tweak my original list to include things like a backrub, or foot massage, or...or....well, see there, I'm already drawing a blank.
Nonsexual affection...that doesn't include hugs or kisses (which he's become accustomed to and is getting spoiled ) help me out if you think of something else.

xo to you, and don't tell me you're getting sick of me too.