For those of us with Kids it is very important to maintain some sort of R with our X. We work on ourselves, be there for the kids and yes try and have a R with the X. It is so important to me and my XW to have a good relationship, mainly for the boys. I often think that she would have nothing to do with me if it weren't for the boys but this is assuming at best. I take each day, one day at a time, be here for my boys and do things I love to do.
I'm a little PO'd at xw right now cause I feel like she has been lying (or at least not telling all the truth) about some things. I need to stop asking questions, maybe that way I wont get no lies.
Anyway, to answer your question "should we be trying to make our relationship work after the D. That is all up to the individual. I want to have the best R I can with her, for several reasons (I love her, I regret the situation, I hate what this is doing to the Kids, I dont believe in D), the lists goes on. The way I look at it is that I really have nothing to loose by having some sort of relationship with her. Who knows what the future holds. Many people believe that once the R goes South, one should just give up and move on. This just isn't the route for me. Don't get me wrong I have a life and I am happier now, but I would still love to have her in my life.
I firmly believe that the best chance of reconciliation is thru the act of real and lasting change. Being happy with yourself makes you the most attractive. If XS is drawn to the this then its their loss, but look at all we have gained .... happiness, confidence, wisdom.
