This sounds EXACTLY like my LDH. He's so straight-laced it's not even funny, and to some extent he's homophobic as well. But I do not believe he's gay...I've paid close attention to his reactions to different women in different situations, and even to me in certain situations...he's not gay. He just takes quite a bit to get going and either stifles, ignores, or simply just doesn't have (for anyone) those sparks of sexual desire that the majority of us do have.
I suspect with my H it's more of a control issue though...I think. Not that he's controlling me so much anymore, but that he holds too much in and doesn't allow himself to be emotionally vulnerable to me. He has a very stressful job, we have a problem sexually speaking, he's been very put down in the past by women, he has very low-self esteem personally (not professionally) so there's no telling what other things he's stressing over that I have no idea about....but he doesn't let these things out, he keeps them all very close to himself....TALK ABOUT STRESS! Stuff like that would make my libido take a nose dive too.
Now there's always the possibility like I said that he simply doesn't experience those sexual desire sparks too...that does happen. In that case he and I are going to need to come to some type of a compromise where he learns to think about fulfilling my needs because he recognizes they are ligitimate needs of mine...and I learn to accept those efforts as true acts of love and not "duty or pity sex". This can be done if necessary, I know he and I can do that...so for me that's some bit of comfort as far as my marriage goes.
